The following TOEFL Integrated Essay was written in class during a writing exercise. For TOEFL Integrated Essays, test takers are instructed to read a short passage for 3 minutes, after which they listen to part of a lecture on the same topic. They are then asked to answer a question in the form of an essay and are given 20 minutes to plan, write, and edit their essays.
This essay was in response to the writing task in Test 2 of "The Official Guide to the TOEFL Test, Fourth Edition" by ETS. This was written by the instructor during the 20-minute activity.
WRITING TASK: Summarize the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they oppose specific points made in the reading passage.
ESSAY:
This set of materials discusses the tendency of some professors to appear on tv. While the reading passage examines the advantages of such pursuits, the listening focuses on the negative effects and consequences that result when professors spend time being on television.
One reason the reading mentions is an advantage to appearing on television is the professor’s ability to reach a wider audience, instead of the smaller university community. The listening, on the other hand, argues that appearing on tv labels the professor as not a serious scholar or educator among his or her colleagues. He is looked upon as an entertainer, not an educator. This results in the professor not being invited to important academic functions or not receiving necessary grants for research.
Showing posts with label TOEFL Integrated essay. Show all posts
Showing posts with label TOEFL Integrated essay. Show all posts
Sunday, June 14, 2015
Wednesday, June 10, 2015
TOEFL Integrated Essay: the philosophy of Realism
This sample TOEFL Integrated Essay responds to the Test 4 writing task on page 200 of "DELTA’s Key to the Next Generation TOEFL Test, Six Practice Tests for the iBT." This was written by the instructor during the 20-minute writing activity.
WRITING TASK: Summarize the points made in the lecture, explaining how they contradict points made in the reading.
ESSAY:
Both the reading and listening passages discuss the philosophy of realism. However, while the reading explains what realism is, the lecture gives reasons why this way of thinking does not promote an ideal environment or solve the world’s problems.
The professor first defines that the philosophy of realism, as mentioned in the reading, as the belief in scientific facts and reason and the commitment to scientific thinking. Then she gives reasons why critics of realism are against this philosophy. One such reason is the fact that realism ignores passion, emotion, and feeling, which also make up the individual. Critics say that not everything, including a person’s feelings and thoughts, can be measured scientifically as proponents of realism argue.
WRITING TASK: Summarize the points made in the lecture, explaining how they contradict points made in the reading.
ESSAY:
Both the reading and listening passages discuss the philosophy of realism. However, while the reading explains what realism is, the lecture gives reasons why this way of thinking does not promote an ideal environment or solve the world’s problems.
The professor first defines that the philosophy of realism, as mentioned in the reading, as the belief in scientific facts and reason and the commitment to scientific thinking. Then she gives reasons why critics of realism are against this philosophy. One such reason is the fact that realism ignores passion, emotion, and feeling, which also make up the individual. Critics say that not everything, including a person’s feelings and thoughts, can be measured scientifically as proponents of realism argue.
Sunday, May 17, 2015
Integrated essays on Method Acting & the Fight or Flight Syndrome
The TOEFL Preparation class practiced independent and integrating writing this past week. The following essays are examples of the two integrated essays we wrote in class within the prescribed time limit.
For the TOEFL integrated essay, students are given 3 minutes to read a passage; they then listen to a lecture on the same topic, and are given 20 minutes to plan, write, and edit their essays.
As the reading passage reappears on one side of the computer screen while they write on the other, students were reminded not to simply copy phrases from the passage into their essays. It's important to paraphrase and say everything in their own words to make it clear that they understood the passage and show that they can express their ideas well.
This integrated essay is from page 428 of the DELTA'S Key to the TOEFL iBT Advanced Skill Practice textbook.
For the TOEFL integrated essay, students are given 3 minutes to read a passage; they then listen to a lecture on the same topic, and are given 20 minutes to plan, write, and edit their essays.
As the reading passage reappears on one side of the computer screen while they write on the other, students were reminded not to simply copy phrases from the passage into their essays. It's important to paraphrase and say everything in their own words to make it clear that they understood the passage and show that they can express their ideas well.
This integrated essay is from page 428 of the DELTA'S Key to the TOEFL iBT Advanced Skill Practice textbook.
The reading passage in this set of materials discusses Method Acting, which requires an actor to immerse himself in all aspects of the character he is playing. The professor in the listening passage, on the other hand, cites problems with this type of acting and says why he doesn’t agree with this method.
The professor first mentions that the playwright or the script writer is the person who creates the character. The actor’s job is merely to convey the writer’s message. According to the professor, it is not the writer’s job to interpret how a character feels as this has already been done by the writer. This is in contrast to the reading passage which mentions that the actor has to interpret a character when using Method acting.
A second feature of Method acting is the expectation that actors draw from their own experiences to produce the emotions of the characters they are playing. The professor disagrees with this concept as he thinks that actors who have never experienced certain emotions, such as those of a murderer, would not be able to accomplish this as they would have nothing in their past to draw from.
The professor also maintains that instead of spending time working on the emotions or “living the part” of the characters, as the reading discusses, actors should be trained in certain skills, instead, such as speaking clearly, projecting, and body language. Extra commitment is unnecessary for actors. In fact, the professor speaks of one actor who didn’t sleep or bathe for a whole week to practice Method acting. The professor said that this was definitely going too far.
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
Doubting research on animal self-awareness: a TOEFL integrated essay
To practice writing a TOEFL integrated essay, students are given three minutes to read a short passage, after which they listen to a lecture related to the topic they just read about. They are then given 20 minutes to outline, write, and edit their essays. This particular exercise is from page 391 of "Delta's Key to the TOEFL iBT" preparation course book.
WRITING TASK: Summarize the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they cast doubt on specific points made in the reading passage.
ESSAY:
The reading passage discusses the idea that chimpanzees have the ability for self-awareness by mentioning an experiment and its positive results. The lecture, on the other hand, casts doubt on this experiment and questions the validity of its results.
The reading explains how scientists used the "mark test" to determine that chimpanzees experience self-awareness. During this test, chimpanzees were allowed to get used to the presence of a mirror and play with it. The animals were then given sleeping pills, and one eyebrow and one ear were marked red while they were unconscious. The chimpanzees were then observed with and without the mirror after they woke up, and scientists recorded how they behaved in both situations. The results of the experiment showed that the animals touched their heads and faces significantly more when the mirror was in the room. In addition, the animals seemed to notice the red spots on their bodies, sniffing and examining their fingers after touching the spots. Furthermore, the animals groomed themselves and made faces in front of the mirror, which made scientists conclude that the chimpanzees were able to be aware of their image in the mirror.
The lecture, on the other hand, questioned the results of the above experiment. First, the professor mentions that the results were inconsistent since in one test, only one chimpanzee touched the red marks. This differed from the other times when most of the chimpanzees showed awareness of the marks on their eyebrows and ears. Second, the lecture says that chimpanzees routinely touch parts of their body and, therefore, can't be interpreted as being aware of their image in the mirror. In fact, one chimpanzee rubbed the marks off even before he saw himself in the mirror. Third, the lecture mentions that chimpanzees are known to groom themselves around each other. Grooming is a social activity among their species when they are in each other's presence. Grooming themselves in front of a mirror, therefore, doesn't necessarily mean that they recognize themselves. It may simply be a social response upon seeing another chimpanzee in the room.
WRITING TASK: Summarize the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they cast doubt on specific points made in the reading passage.
ESSAY:
The reading passage discusses the idea that chimpanzees have the ability for self-awareness by mentioning an experiment and its positive results. The lecture, on the other hand, casts doubt on this experiment and questions the validity of its results.
The reading explains how scientists used the "mark test" to determine that chimpanzees experience self-awareness. During this test, chimpanzees were allowed to get used to the presence of a mirror and play with it. The animals were then given sleeping pills, and one eyebrow and one ear were marked red while they were unconscious. The chimpanzees were then observed with and without the mirror after they woke up, and scientists recorded how they behaved in both situations. The results of the experiment showed that the animals touched their heads and faces significantly more when the mirror was in the room. In addition, the animals seemed to notice the red spots on their bodies, sniffing and examining their fingers after touching the spots. Furthermore, the animals groomed themselves and made faces in front of the mirror, which made scientists conclude that the chimpanzees were able to be aware of their image in the mirror.
The lecture, on the other hand, questioned the results of the above experiment. First, the professor mentions that the results were inconsistent since in one test, only one chimpanzee touched the red marks. This differed from the other times when most of the chimpanzees showed awareness of the marks on their eyebrows and ears. Second, the lecture says that chimpanzees routinely touch parts of their body and, therefore, can't be interpreted as being aware of their image in the mirror. In fact, one chimpanzee rubbed the marks off even before he saw himself in the mirror. Third, the lecture mentions that chimpanzees are known to groom themselves around each other. Grooming is a social activity among their species when they are in each other's presence. Grooming themselves in front of a mirror, therefore, doesn't necessarily mean that they recognize themselves. It may simply be a social response upon seeing another chimpanzee in the room.
-- written by Joe Yu, ESL instructor, during a writing activity in class
Monday, June 3, 2013
A TOEFL Integrated essay: The Turing Test
This essay is in response to the integrated writing task in Model Test 2 of the Barrons TOEFL textbook, 14th edition. During the exercise, students read the reading passage for 3 minutes, after which they listened to part of a lecture on the same topic. We spent 2 minutes to jot down a quick outline, then we wrote for 20 minutes.
Students are encouraged to keep organization in mind. The thesis statement, which is essentially one's answer to the writing task, has to be clear, and each paragraph has to be unified.
ESSAY:
In this set of materials, the reading talks about the Turing Test, which is supposed to determine whether a computer is able to think, while the professor in the listening passage discusses the ability of the computer to answer questions but casts doubt on the idea that any computer can show intelligence even if it passes the test.
The Turing Test, described in the reading, is based on the idea that a computer is determined to be able to think if it can answer questions from a group of people without these people knowing that they were talking to a computer. The test involves the group of people typing or saying questions from one room and waiting for an answer from another room. The people asking the questions don't know whether they are talking to a person or a computer. If in the end, the group thinks that a person had been answering their questions or if they couldn't decide, the computer is said to have passed the Turing Test, which means that it is determined to able to think. Incidentally, no computer has met the challenge and passed the test.
In the listening, the professor questions the validity of the Turing Test by pointing out that a computer's ability to answer questions correctly has nothing to do with its intelligence but in its ability to access a huge reference to come up with the right answer. The professor uses an example of a monolingual English speaker who doesn't speak any Chinese and says that if this English speaker has to answer questions from the Chinese person, though he wouldn't be able to understand a word, if the English speaker had a database which he could refer to, it would in fact be possible for him to give a correct answer. The professor then explains that a computer could do the same thing and when a computer is able to answer correctly with the resources that it has, it would only be displaying its behavioral ability, not its intelligence. He also adds that, in this case, the computer would only be acting intelligent without being intelligent.
This sample essay was written by Joe Yu, ESL instructor, during the 20-minute writing exercise in class.
Students are encouraged to keep organization in mind. The thesis statement, which is essentially one's answer to the writing task, has to be clear, and each paragraph has to be unified.
ESSAY:
In this set of materials, the reading talks about the Turing Test, which is supposed to determine whether a computer is able to think, while the professor in the listening passage discusses the ability of the computer to answer questions but casts doubt on the idea that any computer can show intelligence even if it passes the test.
The Turing Test, described in the reading, is based on the idea that a computer is determined to be able to think if it can answer questions from a group of people without these people knowing that they were talking to a computer. The test involves the group of people typing or saying questions from one room and waiting for an answer from another room. The people asking the questions don't know whether they are talking to a person or a computer. If in the end, the group thinks that a person had been answering their questions or if they couldn't decide, the computer is said to have passed the Turing Test, which means that it is determined to able to think. Incidentally, no computer has met the challenge and passed the test.
In the listening, the professor questions the validity of the Turing Test by pointing out that a computer's ability to answer questions correctly has nothing to do with its intelligence but in its ability to access a huge reference to come up with the right answer. The professor uses an example of a monolingual English speaker who doesn't speak any Chinese and says that if this English speaker has to answer questions from the Chinese person, though he wouldn't be able to understand a word, if the English speaker had a database which he could refer to, it would in fact be possible for him to give a correct answer. The professor then explains that a computer could do the same thing and when a computer is able to answer correctly with the resources that it has, it would only be displaying its behavioral ability, not its intelligence. He also adds that, in this case, the computer would only be acting intelligent without being intelligent.
This sample essay was written by Joe Yu, ESL instructor, during the 20-minute writing exercise in class.
Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Integrated essays on our "fight or flight" mechanism
This integrated essay for the TOEFL is on the "fight or flight" response of human beings. The reading passage presents a standard definition and explanation of this mechanism, while the lecture mentions enlightening new observations revealing that men and women, in fact, react to danger and stress differently.
The following two essays are examples of how test takers can approach this task. The first one covers the text first, then mentions the points made in the lecture. The second one (you may have to click continue) goes right into the listening and contrasts the points made by the professor with those found in the text.
This exercise is on page 426 of DELTA'S Key to the TOEFL iBT Advanced Skill Practice textbook.
TASK: Summarize the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they differ from specific points made in the reading passage.
FIRST ESSAY:
This set of materials talks about the "fight or flight" mechanism in humans. The reading mentions the various ways we react to stressful situations, while the listening adds to the information, explaining that men and women actually deal with negative situations differently.
According to the reading, our fight or flight mechanism allows us to either deal with a problem head on or flee from it if the problem is too large or difficult to handle. A surge of adrenaline is released in our bodies that triggers this response which leads us to attack someone physically or engage someone in a verbal argument if we decide to fight. On the other hand, if we determine fleeing to be the better choice, we withdraw from the situation by leaving the space and avoid people or engage in habits that separate us from society. This can take the form of drug or alcohol abuse.
The lecture, on the other hand, mentions that the fight or flight response actually only refers to men. The professor points out that most of the research done on this mechanism has been done on men, and there is growing evidence that women react to stress differently. Some scientists say that while men engage in fight or flight behavior, women respond to stress by tending and befriending. As an example, scientists noticed that in their workplace, men who encountered stress tended to verbally attack another person and leave the room, while women who were stressed, tended to clean the lab to deal with the mess. In addition, instead of running away, they tended to sit down and talk to a colleague about their predicament. Women, the scientists noticed, avoided fights and were more apt to diffuse the situation by seeking advice and turning to colleagues for help.
The following two essays are examples of how test takers can approach this task. The first one covers the text first, then mentions the points made in the lecture. The second one (you may have to click continue) goes right into the listening and contrasts the points made by the professor with those found in the text.
This exercise is on page 426 of DELTA'S Key to the TOEFL iBT Advanced Skill Practice textbook.
TASK: Summarize the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they differ from specific points made in the reading passage.
FIRST ESSAY:
This set of materials talks about the "fight or flight" mechanism in humans. The reading mentions the various ways we react to stressful situations, while the listening adds to the information, explaining that men and women actually deal with negative situations differently.
According to the reading, our fight or flight mechanism allows us to either deal with a problem head on or flee from it if the problem is too large or difficult to handle. A surge of adrenaline is released in our bodies that triggers this response which leads us to attack someone physically or engage someone in a verbal argument if we decide to fight. On the other hand, if we determine fleeing to be the better choice, we withdraw from the situation by leaving the space and avoid people or engage in habits that separate us from society. This can take the form of drug or alcohol abuse.
The lecture, on the other hand, mentions that the fight or flight response actually only refers to men. The professor points out that most of the research done on this mechanism has been done on men, and there is growing evidence that women react to stress differently. Some scientists say that while men engage in fight or flight behavior, women respond to stress by tending and befriending. As an example, scientists noticed that in their workplace, men who encountered stress tended to verbally attack another person and leave the room, while women who were stressed, tended to clean the lab to deal with the mess. In addition, instead of running away, they tended to sit down and talk to a colleague about their predicament. Women, the scientists noticed, avoided fights and were more apt to diffuse the situation by seeking advice and turning to colleagues for help.
Sunday, March 31, 2013
A TOEFL integrated essay on online encyclopedias
This is another example of a TOEFL integrated essay. The subject is on online encyclopedias. The reading passage challenges their credibility for reasons mentioned in the essay below, while the lecture defends them as viable sources of information.
The class was given 3 minutes to read the text, after which we listened to the lecture. Then everyone wrote their essays within the 20-minute time limit. This essay was written during this 20-minute writing exercise.
WRITING TASK: Summarize the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they oppose the specific points made in the reading passage.
ESSAY:
This set of materials talks about the validity of communal online encyclopedias. While the reading questions the trustworthiness of these online publications by mentioning errors in the articles, problems with hacking, and lack of editorial decisions on which subjects should be given more weight, the listening defends these online encyclopedias by countering the points made in the reading.
The first point mentioned in the text is that online encyclopedias lack credentials because anyone can contribute and make changes to the articles. It points out that traditional encyclopedias, on the other hand, are only written by experts making their articles more credible. The professor in this listening passage, however, disagrees with the text and mentions that traditional encyclopedias are never really perfectly accurate in the first place, and in fact, the errors found in online encyclopedias can easily be corrected giving the articles their updated information.
The second point mentioned in the text is online encyclopedias' vulnerability to hacking. The reading reminds us that since anyone can contribute and make changes to articles, hackers and vandals can easily compromise the content by correcting or adding information that is completely wrong or false. The professor, on the other hand, states that the crucial sections of articles in online encyclopedias are actually in read-only formats and are therefore protected from hacking. In addition to this, she adds that there are special editors that monitor changes in these encyclopedias to eliminate any malicious or false information.
Third, the reading points out that the topics covered in online encyclopedias are given equal weight, and that there is a lack of editorial decision-making involved in giving more significant subjects more importance than trendy or popular topics. The professor, on the other hand, insists that this variety of subjects is actually an advantage, and that the reason that traditional encyclopedias have to give more importance to some subjects is their lack of space.
-- Joe Yu, ESL instructor
The class was given 3 minutes to read the text, after which we listened to the lecture. Then everyone wrote their essays within the 20-minute time limit. This essay was written during this 20-minute writing exercise.
WRITING TASK: Summarize the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they oppose the specific points made in the reading passage.
ESSAY:
This set of materials talks about the validity of communal online encyclopedias. While the reading questions the trustworthiness of these online publications by mentioning errors in the articles, problems with hacking, and lack of editorial decisions on which subjects should be given more weight, the listening defends these online encyclopedias by countering the points made in the reading.
The first point mentioned in the text is that online encyclopedias lack credentials because anyone can contribute and make changes to the articles. It points out that traditional encyclopedias, on the other hand, are only written by experts making their articles more credible. The professor in this listening passage, however, disagrees with the text and mentions that traditional encyclopedias are never really perfectly accurate in the first place, and in fact, the errors found in online encyclopedias can easily be corrected giving the articles their updated information.
The second point mentioned in the text is online encyclopedias' vulnerability to hacking. The reading reminds us that since anyone can contribute and make changes to articles, hackers and vandals can easily compromise the content by correcting or adding information that is completely wrong or false. The professor, on the other hand, states that the crucial sections of articles in online encyclopedias are actually in read-only formats and are therefore protected from hacking. In addition to this, she adds that there are special editors that monitor changes in these encyclopedias to eliminate any malicious or false information.
Third, the reading points out that the topics covered in online encyclopedias are given equal weight, and that there is a lack of editorial decision-making involved in giving more significant subjects more importance than trendy or popular topics. The professor, on the other hand, insists that this variety of subjects is actually an advantage, and that the reason that traditional encyclopedias have to give more importance to some subjects is their lack of space.
-- Joe Yu, ESL instructor
Friday, March 1, 2013
A TOEFL integrated essay on social promotion
For this writing task, the class read a short passage in three minutes then listened to a talk on the same topic. The reading passage is on page 497 of the Longman Preparation Course for the TOEFL. The students then answered a question in the form of an essay. The following essay was written within the 20-minute time limit during the writing exercise. As always, note the organization and how each paragraph focuses on a single topic.
QUESTION: How do the ideas in the listening passage challenge the ideas in the reading passage?
ESSAY:
The reading and the listening passages discuss the idea of ending social promotion, the practice of allowing students who are not doing well to move up to the next grade. The reading presents the problem experienced by the Hamilton School District and the solution the district thought would solve the problem. The listening, on the other hand, discusses the negative results of the district's attempt to end this problem. In short, the district didn't succeed in eliminating the problem.
The reading passage talks about the practice of social promotion at one particular school district, the Hamilton School District, and the fact that it led to a high drop-out rate among its students. In an attempt to solve this problem, the district decided to test students before they were allowed to advance to the next level. Because testing students at the end of each year was not feasible, the district decided to test the students at the end of the 6th grade, before they moved on to junior high.
By implementing this strategy, the district expected to see three positive results. One result would be that social promotion would end since teachers would not have a good reason to promote students who will eventually be held back after the 6th grade. Another result the district expected to see was that students would be more prepared to study in junior high and high schools. Last, the district expected that more students would graduate high school since they would be ready for the difficult material in the higher grades.
The listening passage, on the other hand, reveals that the district's attempt failed. First, they found that social promotion didn't end in the lower grades, which had negative consequences when it came to testing them after the 6th grade. Second, there were as many students who were unprepared before the testing program was implemented, and third, they found that the drop-out rate, in fact, increased. As it turned out, more students were held back and they were so unprepared for junior high school that many were held back at least twice. This caused discouragement among the students and many of them dropped out.
In summary, the program failed, and as a result, the school district ended it after 10 years.
This example essay was written by Joe Yu, ESL instructor.
QUESTION: How do the ideas in the listening passage challenge the ideas in the reading passage?
ESSAY:
The reading and the listening passages discuss the idea of ending social promotion, the practice of allowing students who are not doing well to move up to the next grade. The reading presents the problem experienced by the Hamilton School District and the solution the district thought would solve the problem. The listening, on the other hand, discusses the negative results of the district's attempt to end this problem. In short, the district didn't succeed in eliminating the problem.
The reading passage talks about the practice of social promotion at one particular school district, the Hamilton School District, and the fact that it led to a high drop-out rate among its students. In an attempt to solve this problem, the district decided to test students before they were allowed to advance to the next level. Because testing students at the end of each year was not feasible, the district decided to test the students at the end of the 6th grade, before they moved on to junior high.
By implementing this strategy, the district expected to see three positive results. One result would be that social promotion would end since teachers would not have a good reason to promote students who will eventually be held back after the 6th grade. Another result the district expected to see was that students would be more prepared to study in junior high and high schools. Last, the district expected that more students would graduate high school since they would be ready for the difficult material in the higher grades.
The listening passage, on the other hand, reveals that the district's attempt failed. First, they found that social promotion didn't end in the lower grades, which had negative consequences when it came to testing them after the 6th grade. Second, there were as many students who were unprepared before the testing program was implemented, and third, they found that the drop-out rate, in fact, increased. As it turned out, more students were held back and they were so unprepared for junior high school that many were held back at least twice. This caused discouragement among the students and many of them dropped out.
In summary, the program failed, and as a result, the school district ended it after 10 years.
This example essay was written by Joe Yu, ESL instructor.
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
A TOEFL integrated essay on Venus
This is another example of an integrated essay for the TOEFL. This was written within the 20-minute time limit during our writing task. For this essay, we first read a passage on the planet Venus on page 460 of the Longman Preparation Course for the TOEFL iBT. We read the passage in three minutes. After which, we listened to a lecture on the same topic. I often stress the importance of organization when it comes to writing. Students should spend the first two minutes to create a rough outline and leave 2 minutes in the end to edit their work.
Note the thesis statement in the introduction. Your thesis statement should answer the question. In this essay, I covered the reading passage in two paragraphs to clearly separate the two topics mentioned: the visibility of Venus from earth and the high temperatures on Venus. The last paragraph covers the information added from the listening.
QUESTION: How does the information in the listening passage add to the information in the reading passage?
ESSAY:
This set of materials discusses some characteristics of the planet Venus. The reading mentions the planet's visibility from earth, as well as its temperature. The listening adds to this information by giving a reason for Venus' high temperature.
In the reading passage, we learn that Venus is also referred to as both the Morning Star and the Evening Star because it shines brightly and can be seen from earth even when the sun is partially present at dawn and at dusk. We then learn that this is due to the presence of thick white clouds that reflect sunlight back to earth.
The reading also points out that the temperature on Venus is quite hot at 900 degrees Fahrenheit. Scientists learned this fact after one space probe that was able to send data back to earth before it was destroyed revealed this fact. The probe also revealed that the clouds on Venus, in fact, are composed of sulfuric acid, not carbon dioxide, and that they never part to allow any sunlight into the planet.
In the listening passage, the professor provides some insight on the extreme heat on Venus. She points out that this has nothing to do with its close proximity to the sun. Indeed, Mercury, which is closer to the sun, is cooler than Venus. The reason for its high temperature is that the atmosphere on Venus is made up of high amounts of carbon dioxide, which acts as a barrier. It traps the heat and prevents it from escaping, making the temperature on the planet intensely high.
This example essay is written by Joe Yu, ESL instructor.
Note the thesis statement in the introduction. Your thesis statement should answer the question. In this essay, I covered the reading passage in two paragraphs to clearly separate the two topics mentioned: the visibility of Venus from earth and the high temperatures on Venus. The last paragraph covers the information added from the listening.
QUESTION: How does the information in the listening passage add to the information in the reading passage?
ESSAY:
This set of materials discusses some characteristics of the planet Venus. The reading mentions the planet's visibility from earth, as well as its temperature. The listening adds to this information by giving a reason for Venus' high temperature.
In the reading passage, we learn that Venus is also referred to as both the Morning Star and the Evening Star because it shines brightly and can be seen from earth even when the sun is partially present at dawn and at dusk. We then learn that this is due to the presence of thick white clouds that reflect sunlight back to earth.
The reading also points out that the temperature on Venus is quite hot at 900 degrees Fahrenheit. Scientists learned this fact after one space probe that was able to send data back to earth before it was destroyed revealed this fact. The probe also revealed that the clouds on Venus, in fact, are composed of sulfuric acid, not carbon dioxide, and that they never part to allow any sunlight into the planet.
In the listening passage, the professor provides some insight on the extreme heat on Venus. She points out that this has nothing to do with its close proximity to the sun. Indeed, Mercury, which is closer to the sun, is cooler than Venus. The reason for its high temperature is that the atmosphere on Venus is made up of high amounts of carbon dioxide, which acts as a barrier. It traps the heat and prevents it from escaping, making the temperature on the planet intensely high.
This example essay is written by Joe Yu, ESL instructor.
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
A TOEFL Integrated essay on supernovae
This is an example of an integrated essay on the TOEFL (Test of English as a Foreign Language). This essay responds to the writing task on page 407 of the Longman Preparation Course for the TOEFL. Students have three minutes to read the passage on supernovae. They then listen to a lecture on the same topic and write their essays within the 20-minute time limit.
It's important to write a well-organized essay, to have a clear thesis statement, which is the answer to the question, and to convey how the listening relates to the reading. Students should spend 2 minutes in the beginning to prepare a rough outline and leave 2 minutes in the end to edit their work before time runs out.
QUESTION: How does the information in the reading passage contrast with the information in the listening passage?
ESSAY:
This set of materials talks about supernovae, a celestial phenomenon that occurs when a star explodes. While the reading discusses the type 1 supernova, the listening talks about the type 2 kind.
According to the reading, a type 1 supernova only occurs when two stars exist next to each other and one star becomes a white dwarf, which is a star that has shrunk and is on the verge of collapse. Its companion star, on the other hand, continues to grow and eventually has to stop expanding once it comes in contact with the white dwarf. When this happens, material from the large star transfers into the white dwarf, and when the white dwarf grows to a critical mass (1.4 times that of the sun), the white dwarf explodes. This explosion is called a supernova, and it has been seen by the naked eye twice in recorded history, but more has been observed since the invention of the telescope.
On the other hand, the listening describes a type 2 supernova. The lecturer mentions that in a type 2 supernova, only one star is involved. This star is in the process of dying. It has become massive; its core is getting hotter and hotter, and once it reaches its critical mass or ten times the size of the sun, it collapses and explodes in a thermonuclear reaction, which is also called a supernova event. According to the professor, the most famous type 2 supernova was observed in China and was visible to the naked eye for 23 days in daylight and for a period of about two years at night. In 1987, another type 2 supernova was observed. This one was said to have occured close enough to the Milky Way galaxy and was strong enough to be seen by the naked eye.
This sample essay was written by Joe Yu, ESL instructor.
It's important to write a well-organized essay, to have a clear thesis statement, which is the answer to the question, and to convey how the listening relates to the reading. Students should spend 2 minutes in the beginning to prepare a rough outline and leave 2 minutes in the end to edit their work before time runs out.
QUESTION: How does the information in the reading passage contrast with the information in the listening passage?
ESSAY:
This set of materials talks about supernovae, a celestial phenomenon that occurs when a star explodes. While the reading discusses the type 1 supernova, the listening talks about the type 2 kind.
According to the reading, a type 1 supernova only occurs when two stars exist next to each other and one star becomes a white dwarf, which is a star that has shrunk and is on the verge of collapse. Its companion star, on the other hand, continues to grow and eventually has to stop expanding once it comes in contact with the white dwarf. When this happens, material from the large star transfers into the white dwarf, and when the white dwarf grows to a critical mass (1.4 times that of the sun), the white dwarf explodes. This explosion is called a supernova, and it has been seen by the naked eye twice in recorded history, but more has been observed since the invention of the telescope.
On the other hand, the listening describes a type 2 supernova. The lecturer mentions that in a type 2 supernova, only one star is involved. This star is in the process of dying. It has become massive; its core is getting hotter and hotter, and once it reaches its critical mass or ten times the size of the sun, it collapses and explodes in a thermonuclear reaction, which is also called a supernova event. According to the professor, the most famous type 2 supernova was observed in China and was visible to the naked eye for 23 days in daylight and for a period of about two years at night. In 1987, another type 2 supernova was observed. This one was said to have occured close enough to the Milky Way galaxy and was strong enough to be seen by the naked eye.
This sample essay was written by Joe Yu, ESL instructor.
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